The Spawn of Patter.

That is the most clever-yet-somewhat-dirty-sounding way I can refer to Patterson. Yesterday was his birthday, but since the Great Blogger Debacle of '06 happened (many of you here are aware, I'm sure), I was unable to post my greetings until now. So, here's to the gent who Danhole fondly calls "Canteen Boy," and who nearly drove his roommates in college to homicidal acts when he left his computer locked while he was away for the weekend, and whilst it played the score to The Last of the Mohicans on repeat.

We salute you!

By the way, what do you get a guy for his birthday who already has his own water purification tablets and MREs? I mean, he gave me a camping shovel for my birthday. He is so hard to shop for!

By the way, it was also The Johnsonian's birthday, but I think I'm supposed to be keeping that on the down-low.